A proud new dad sits down to have a drink with his father
"Well son, now that you’ve got a kid of your own, I think it’s time to give you this"
"Dad, you don’t mean-"
"Yes son, I do" *Dad pulls out copy of 1001 Dad Jokes, 5th Edition*
"Dad… I’m honoured…", he says, tears sparkling in his eyes.
"Hi honoured", replies his father. "I’m dad".
i am so done with this scholarship application
WAIT NEVERMIND THIS HAPPENED
my nigga how u get a camera for under the water?
IS THAT A FISH
makin my way downtown
faces pass and im homebound
What the actUAL FUCK AM I LOOKING AT JESUS CHRIST
Somebody took a picture of their dog everyday for a year kinda like that video on YouTube and it’s so cute :3
I know a few fellas who neglected to read this as a child.
is your heart supposed to pound for ten minutes straight after you answer one question in class
it’s weird how people say “follow your dreams” instead of “follow your ambitions” because once i had a dream where i worked for a place that tried to genetically engineer ducks to speak english except the ducks only criticized people’s fashion sense
please follow your dream
Don’t touch what you can’t afford aka me